Although I consider myself a very hopeless romantic, I don’t feel that marriage is for me. Don’t get me wrong, I believe in being monogamous and faithful but I just don’t see myself ever getting married.
I’ve been in love twice in my life and both times I actually thought I wanted to marry them. Things didn’t work out and I’m happily single now.
My parents have been married for nearly 35 years. They are basically the only happy, successful marriage on both sides of the family. They even counseled engaged, newlyweds, and married couples for several years.
I learned a lot from my mom over the years. I learned what to look for in a partner and also some red flags to watch out for. I learned that a marriage takes work. I learned that it’s more than just love. A marriage based on only passion will not last. You need kindness, respect, loyalty, trust, and among all else, you need to be friends.
I’ve watched so many marriages fall apart right before me. Some marriages I knew won’t last. Then there were other marriages that failed, that really shocked and saddened me.
I meant what I said, I am a hopeless romantic. I absolutely love to see couples who have been married 25 years and up.
In fact, just today, we had a client come in and we made small talk with him. It turns out that he and his wife will celebrate their 55th wedding anniversary this July. He was a very funny, witty, and sweet man. I asked him what was the secret to staying together for so long, he replied, “We decided long ago that whoever filed for divorce first had to take the kids.” I thought that was pretty funny. On a more serious note, they spend a lot of time together, talking, laughing, arguing, shopping, traveling, you name it. That’s what it’s all about.
I feel that marriage isn’t for me but I’m always thrilled to see a happy couple.
This isn’t a pity party. I’m not feeling sorry for myself. This is just how I feel. Marriage isn’t for everyone. My parents, of course, don’t like this kind of talk and claim that I just haven’t met the right person. Maybe. I think I have a better chance of winning the lottery though.
I do hope to be in a long term, committed relationship someday and if that does happen, I don’t think it will involve exchanging rings or vows.