Life, Writings

“You”

When I first saw you smile, I was hooked

You were two years ahead of me

We had mutual friends, so I always had an excuse to see you

Eventually, we became friends on our own

We grew close, and spent lots of time together

We had the occasional argument but always made up

I always wanted be near you

We were young, but I knew I loved you

Others caught your eye, while I secretly pinned for you

The most difficult moments were when you were dating someone else

You never thought of me that way, I had to accept it

I was at your graduation, saying a painful goodbye

Wondering when or if I would see you again

We lost touch for a few years before we found our way back

It was nice at first, catching up

But things were different, we were different

Life happened, things changed

You made comments that I didn’t like

I did my best to ignore them

I still held a candle for you, but settled for being your friend

We talked a little, then talked a lot

Soon we were talking everyday

You made more comments that bothered me

I let you know it bothered me

You told me it was essentially my problem

I learned to deal with it

We continued to talk constantly

Then came that wonderful day when you revealed you also had feelings for me

And we settled into a situation, a routine

It was nice, being open and honest with you

I got to tell you and show you how much I loved you

Then the arguments started

I felt disrespected and unappreciated

You felt I was being childish, which is how you treated me

I tried to make things work, I did

I compromised, I changed

I apologized when I was wrong

I apologized when you were wrong

I tried so damn hard

Anything to save us, I wanted us to make it

But the fights continued, and I was pushed too far

I was hurt and I wanted to hurt you too

I let out all my suppressed anger and resentment

I said very hurtful things

Some of those things I meant, some I didn’t

I just wanted to hurt you the way you hurt me

I was so angry for the longest time

Now I just feel sadness

Though it’s probably for the best

We still have our mutual friends

And it’s still painful to talk about you

But we shouldn’t be in each other’s lives

We tried and we failed

It wasn’t meant to be

Just know that I will always love you

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